Another confusing party
Tonight was opening night for Tavern. Show went well. Show's too long. Party afterwards went ok too. Not enough food. Enough wine. I invited K to join me. She was happy to come because she might not have on her own, and she knows a few of the actors, and most of the crew, though she hasn't been active at our theatre in several months. I always enjoy spending time with her. She's closer to my age(actually older) and is very attractive in her own way (isn't everybody?). We have this ongoing joke between us that we are continually dating. We started dating when LotR movies came out. Each year we made a date to see them at the first showing. Since those ended, we've found excuses to go out several times. We even have another one for next month to see a band here in town. But speaking of bands.
For the past week S has been telling me about this band playing down the street. The Tossers. Irish punk rock. She discovered them in Chicago at a punk festival. She has been saying that I had to hear this band, that we'd go out after the show and the band started at midnight. I thought that this was a neat idea, and was really looking forward to clubbing with S. I knew I'd catch hell from Wife, but oh well, I don't care and she'll get over it. Well, as the night progressed, I realized that my idealized vision of the nights events were not to be. She was telling everybody about the band and the outing was turning into quite the gig. On the upside, and here is the confusing part, E was there. She had been drinking already and had quite the buzz on after the show, and before the band. Evidently, when she's drunk, I'm tolerable. She was very friendly, and outgoing, lots of touching and hugging. This is a good thing. This is almost always a good thing. Except when you can't touch her back or even hug her. S, at least, doesn't seem to have a problem with me being physical in that way. Which is good, cause she's very huggable. But I can never let myself be myself again; I'll never trust myself again not to go too far. It really felt good though, to have S seem to really want me there, even though I had to do the social niceties and 'ditch my date', er, I mean, walk K back to her car after the show, since she didn't want to see the band. So I had to hook up with them later at the bar. That was the next bad omen. This bar has abysmal sound. not bad, just that either the band or house mix doesn't know what sound is. They equate quality with volume. If it's loud it must be good. The band was halfway decent. I really don't know if, given a good mixer, would be really good or really suck. So much crap can be buried in LOUD sound. After an hour my head was pounding and couldn't hear ANYTHING ANYBODY WAS SHOUTING INTO MY EARS. Another person in the outing is one of our crew people, a new person, call her C. She is one of those people who, I suspect, might like me enough to take to bed, if I so desired. I won't say I haven't thought about it(I always think about sex), but I don't find enough chemistry with her to follow up on it. Anyway, she was rather clingy, and knew some people there that she wanted to introduce me to. I put her off for a while. Then E came up and said SOMETHING IN MY EAR THAT I DIDN'T CATCH, but then went off with S, arm in arm up the stairs to the balcony. They didn't come back for some time, and C asked again if I wanted to go up and meet these people. Up was the key word. OK we go up and it's a small balcony. There's the sound mix station, and a narrow balcony around the main floor. But no S and E. Gone. Poof. Some other of their friends, but no them. So after the obligatories to C's friends, I made excuses, and left. My head was pounding, I was really feeling alone, and if I were to stay, I would start drinking really heavily, which would not be good for either the drive home, or the reception when I got there. All in all, it was a good time. I wish I could have spent more of it with E and S, but they're both too good looking and too young not to have a bevy of young admirers always in their orbit. No way I can compete with that. And S, as always when she gets dolled up, looked really hot.
So now I'm back at home, blogging in bed, alone and as frustrated as ever, wondering if I should stop drinking (another episode from tonight prompted this thought), or drink more.
Still waiting for that click.
For the past week S has been telling me about this band playing down the street. The Tossers. Irish punk rock. She discovered them in Chicago at a punk festival. She has been saying that I had to hear this band, that we'd go out after the show and the band started at midnight. I thought that this was a neat idea, and was really looking forward to clubbing with S. I knew I'd catch hell from Wife, but oh well, I don't care and she'll get over it. Well, as the night progressed, I realized that my idealized vision of the nights events were not to be. She was telling everybody about the band and the outing was turning into quite the gig. On the upside, and here is the confusing part, E was there. She had been drinking already and had quite the buzz on after the show, and before the band. Evidently, when she's drunk, I'm tolerable. She was very friendly, and outgoing, lots of touching and hugging. This is a good thing. This is almost always a good thing. Except when you can't touch her back or even hug her. S, at least, doesn't seem to have a problem with me being physical in that way. Which is good, cause she's very huggable. But I can never let myself be myself again; I'll never trust myself again not to go too far. It really felt good though, to have S seem to really want me there, even though I had to do the social niceties and 'ditch my date', er, I mean, walk K back to her car after the show, since she didn't want to see the band. So I had to hook up with them later at the bar. That was the next bad omen. This bar has abysmal sound. not bad, just that either the band or house mix doesn't know what sound is. They equate quality with volume. If it's loud it must be good. The band was halfway decent. I really don't know if, given a good mixer, would be really good or really suck. So much crap can be buried in LOUD sound. After an hour my head was pounding and couldn't hear ANYTHING ANYBODY WAS SHOUTING INTO MY EARS. Another person in the outing is one of our crew people, a new person, call her C. She is one of those people who, I suspect, might like me enough to take to bed, if I so desired. I won't say I haven't thought about it(I always think about sex), but I don't find enough chemistry with her to follow up on it. Anyway, she was rather clingy, and knew some people there that she wanted to introduce me to. I put her off for a while. Then E came up and said SOMETHING IN MY EAR THAT I DIDN'T CATCH, but then went off with S, arm in arm up the stairs to the balcony. They didn't come back for some time, and C asked again if I wanted to go up and meet these people. Up was the key word. OK we go up and it's a small balcony. There's the sound mix station, and a narrow balcony around the main floor. But no S and E. Gone. Poof. Some other of their friends, but no them. So after the obligatories to C's friends, I made excuses, and left. My head was pounding, I was really feeling alone, and if I were to stay, I would start drinking really heavily, which would not be good for either the drive home, or the reception when I got there. All in all, it was a good time. I wish I could have spent more of it with E and S, but they're both too good looking and too young not to have a bevy of young admirers always in their orbit. No way I can compete with that. And S, as always when she gets dolled up, looked really hot.
So now I'm back at home, blogging in bed, alone and as frustrated as ever, wondering if I should stop drinking (another episode from tonight prompted this thought), or drink more.
Still waiting for that click.
posted by Intothelight4now at 3:45 AM
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